Ten Reasons Why I Haven’t Written Anything Today

Ten Reasons Why I Haven’t Written Anything Today

1) I don’t want to get a repetitive strain injury while typing.

2) There’s so much fake news that I can’t trust any research sources, not even my dictionary.

3) The name of my main character turned out to be a vile word in Serbian, so I needed to think of a new one that’s not offensive in any languages.

4) I want to avoid clichés like the plague.

5) I want to avoid old jokes like that one above.

6) Every idea I have has already been done so many times that I’m worried about plagiarising myself.

7) Someone tweeted something so outrageously stupid that my head’s exploded.

8) All the unimportant notifications from Facebook filled my inbox beyond capacity, releasing a tidal wave of spam, drowning me in digital waste.

9) I’m sure I’m coming down with the flu – so I can’t work if I’m seriously ill.

10) I fear that anything that I do write will offend someone somewhere, resulting in a barrage of hate mail, death threats and invitations to join political parties.


Inside the writer’s mind #220

For info on how to make your own comic book.

My book of 200+ jokes is still available on Amazon for anyone interested …

Amazon US / Amazon UK

Inside the writer’s mind #319

Ten Reasons Why I Hate My Printer

  1. It prints only a five pages before running out of ink.
  2. A new black ink cartridge costs £20.
  3. If it runs out of colour ink, it won’t print out in black.
  4. A colour ink cartridge costs £9000.
  5. You have to order new ink only from the manufacturer, which takes about a month to arrive.
  6. The ink runs out before it gets here.
  7. Even when the ink is full, it won’t print out without first doing a “cleaning” that uses half of the ink.
  8. Sometimes the printer thinks the cartridge is a fake when it isn’t, so it won’t let it print out anything.
  9. It’s cheaper to melt some gold and use that as ink.
  10. If you leave your printer for more than a week, the ink dries out, gumming up the machine, forcing you to buy a new one.